Complicated
by rubycaspar
Summary: In 'The Seer' Teyla tells Davos that her situation is complicated. He has no idea... solar flares, darkened rooms and giant plants  SHEYLA, major spoilers for Series Four. COMPLETE.
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer – I own none of the Stargate franchise. I just like to play with it. _

_Spoilers – Conversion, First Strike, and Series Four spoilers. _

_A/N – I started this a few months ago and then put it to one side. I realised that it kind of fits in with the spoilers for Series Four, so here it is. At the moment I'm thinking it will be two chapters, possibly three. It will probably be finished by tomorrow. Please leave me a review and let me know what you think! _

_**Complicated**__** – Chapter One**_

Teyla was crouching next to some rubble, pulling up handfuls of grass and letting the blades fall between her fingers. They had been on PG4-616 for almost three hours now, and had found nothing except the remains of a civilisation obviously destroyed centuries ago. All that was left was overgrown ruins.

John was sitting on a slab a few feet away from her, watching her closely. She had been getting more and more frustrated the longer they stayed here; he could see it in her face and in the deliberate movements of her hands as she ripped up the grass.

She never said anything, but he knew that her hope rose with every new planet they visited, and he hated to see it dashed every time. They were no closer to finding the Athosians than when they had first gone missing.

John had tried to be there for her the last few weeks but there was very little he could do to help. He had ensured that every field team looked for the Athosians whenever they were off-world and all had had extra missions scheduled specifically for that purpose. His own team were taking more missions than any, but still John felt he wasn't doing enough.

But he didn't know what else to do.

Teyla carried out her duties in the team and in Atlantis as diligently as ever, and to the untrained eye it would seem that the only thing she did differently was train in the gym a little more. However, John could see how much the strain was beginning to show, and that she was training to let out her frustration as much as improving her skill.

John tore his eyes away from Teyla and looked over to where Drs Freeman and Whitely were excitedly examining one of the long-fallen pillars and the writing on them. It seemed that the race who had built this city had meticulously documented their history all over their buildings, and the interesting thing was that… well, John had stopped listening right about there.

John heard the sound of a twig snapping. Teyla's frustration had reached new levels.

"Teyla, why don't you head back to the 'gate?" he said.

She looked up at John when he spoke to her, her brow furrowed in confusion. "Why?" She asked.

_Because you need to go to the gym and beat the crap out of someone_. That didn't sound particularly good.

"There's not much to do here," he said. It was the truth. "You might as well head back to Atlantis and let Carter know what we've found, and that we'll be back soon."

Teyla looked at him in silence for a moment. John almost expected her to argue, but she stood up suddenly, letting the shards of the twig she had snapped fall to the ground.

"Alright," she said. "I will see you back on Atlantis, Colonel."

John frowned as he watched her walk away. She was obviously pissed off that he had sent her back to Atlantis, but it was for her own good. Babysitting a couple of archaeologists was hardly the best use of her time.

John sighed and looked back over at the doctors. It was hardly the best use of his, either.

XOXOXOXOX

Teyla didn't look back as she strode towards the 'gate. Instead she concentrated on crushing as many of the leaves and twigs that lay in her path as possible.

John had sent her away. He had just ordered her back to Atlantis. It was true that there was nothing for her to do on the planet, but there was nothing for Ronon or Rodney to do either, and yet they were allowed to remain. No, he had not wanted _her _there.

The last few weeks had been trying for her, but she had done her utmost to ensure that her feelings had not interfered with her duties. But John obviously didn't see it that way.

The 'gate was on the other side of a hill, and it took Teyla about twenty minutes to get there. Instead of cooling off on the way there, she was even angrier by the time she arrived.

She raised her hand to start to dial the 'gate and found that it was trembling slightly. Teyla shook her head and sat down on the ground, taking deep breaths to try and calm herself. So much had happened in the last few weeks, and yet there was so little that Teyla could do. She had never felt so helpless. Or so angry.

Teyla sat still for five minutes and then, when she felt a little calmer, she got up and dialled Alantis. The wormhole engaged and she sent through her IDC. With one last, calming breath, Teyla stepped through the stargate.

And stepped back out onto PG4-616.

Teyla blinked in confusion as the wormhole disengaged behind her. She was back on the planet she had just tried to leave. She had stepped through the stargate, she was sure of it. And yet here she was.

She didn't have much time to dwell on it, though, because just then John and Rodney appeared over the crest of the hill. They stopped when they saw her, but soon started walking again.

"Hey Teyla," John called as they neared her. He smiled broadly at her.

Teyla didn't smile back. Her anger had momentarily been replaced by her surprise, but was rapidly returning. John had sent her away, only to follow a few minutes later. Why? And why was he smiling?

"What are you doing here?" John asked.

Rodney spoke up before Teyla could answer. "Could you two do this later?" He asked, starting to dial the 'gate. "I need to get back for a meeting. We're already late."

The wormhole engaged and Rodney sent through his IDC, still talking. Teyla opened her mouth to tell Rodney what had happened to her but he was already walking through.

"Teyla, are you okay?" John asked. Teyla turned to face him, her anger welling up again, but stopped at the look on his face. He looked worried, but there was something else – something in his eyes. He was looking at her with emotion that she had never seen on his face before. He never looked at her like that.

Anything Teyla had thought to say died in her throat, and she nodded dumbly. John gave her his usual crooked smile. "So, why are you here?" He asked. "Looking for me?"

Before Teyla could answer, their radios crackled into life. "_Colonel Sheppard, are you coming through_?" Chuck's voice said.

John smiled at Teyla again and tapped his earpiece. "Yep, I'm on my way through with Teyla," he said.

"_Teyla's with you?_"

"Yeah, she's here," John replied, smiling at Teyla again. She was starting to feel very confused – John did not usually smile so much, especially in the last couple of months.

"Come on, let's go," John said, nodding towards the 'gate. Teyla nodded again and they walked through it.

To Teyla's immense relief, when they stepped out they were back on Atlantis. Rodney had disappeared and Teyla couldn't see any other scientists she knew around, so she decided to track down Rodney later. She turned to John to tell him about the 'gate malfunction, but he wasn't looking at her. He was waving to someone in the control room. Teyla looked up and saw that it was Colonel Carter.

"I'm gonna go talk to Sam," John said, turning back to Teyla. "You coming?"

Teyla shook her head. "No, I am going to go and work out," she said.

John stared at her. "Are you sure you're okay?" He asked.

Teyla frowned. "I am _fine_," she said. "I just want to spar."

John nodded. "Okay," he said, looking a little confused. "I'll see you later."

Teyla nodded and hurried off towards the locker room. She didn't know why, but John was making her uncomfortable. The way he smiled at her was very… well, she wasn't going to deny that she enjoyed it, but it was odd. The only time he had ever looked at her like that was when he had come back from Earth and come to find her and Ronon on New Athos.

The thought of it reminded Teyla of her missing people – as so many things did – and she pushed all thoughts of John away, walking as quickly as possible. She had to stop, though, when she saw Katie Brown and another scientist wheeling a gigantic plant on a trolley.

"Katie… what is this?" She asked. Katie offered her a weak smile but didn't stop pushing.

"The new nutritious soil has got a little out of hand," she said over her shoulder. "We're sending it all through the 'gate before it gets any further."

Teyla nodded dumbly and watched her disappear down the corridor. Shaking her head she pushed open the door to the locker room.

Once she was changed Teyla headed straight to the gym, and she started to go through her drills. She felt her frustration drain away as she moved, and began to understand why John had sent her back early. He knew better than anyone that she hated to be idle, and she could do more for her people on Atlantis than on PG4-616.

After about an hour Teyla paused to have a drink of water and noticed John standing in the doorway of the gym, leaning against the frame and smiling at her in that way again.

"Hey," he said.

Teyla nodded to him and turned away to open her water bottle. That smile did things to her that she didn't want him to notice.

"Hello John," she said. "How long have you been standing there?"

John shrugged and stepped into the gym. "A while," he said. "I could watch you for hours."

Teyla looked back up at him in surprise. She could feel herself blushing, and she quickly sat down on the windowsill with her back to the wall. It wasn't like John to be so… open. What was going on?

John came over to the windowsill and sat down next to her with his back to the window, so her feet were almost on his lap. She drew them a little closer to herself to give him more room.

"I told Sam you'd see her at dinner," he said. "I hope that's okay."

Teyla nodded. "Yes, that's fine," she answered. She glanced out of the window. The sun was only just setting, so she had a couple of hours. Maybe she should try and get some sleep.

Teyla suddenly felt John's hand on her head. She looked round at him and his hand slid over her hair until it was cupping her cheek. He smiled at her again. "I missed you," he said.

Teyla drew a shaky breath, trying to get her suddenly elevated heartbeat under control. This was all too much… she must be dreaming. She had been away for four days, only returning two days ago, but she had been away for much longer than that before. And this… this had definitely never happened before.

She had missed him too, and not just those few days. It seemed that since they had left Lantea they had not spent any time together. So much had happened, and they had both been so busy. But still, he had never touched her like this before. He had never… he did not say things like this.

"John…" she said, wondering how to tell him that she didn't know what was going on. But she couldn't stop her hand rising of its own accord to cover his against her cheek.

Thinking of it afterwards, Teyla was sure that she hadn't seen it coming, but when John kissed her it was as though she had always expected it. She wasn't shocked, like the first time he had kissed her. This time she kissed him back with all she was worth. And this time he didn't stop.

Teyla's arms wound tight around John's neck as he pressed her against the wall. His tongue slid against hers and she moaned into his open mouth, arching against him. John wrapped his arms around her back and pulled her to him. She straddled his lap and kissed him so savagely the back of his head hit the window behind him.

John's response was to bury his hand into her hair, and lean forward into her, deepening the kiss further. Eventually they had to break apart for oxygen, but John barely took a breath before he started kissing her again, this time tracing his lips along her jaw and down her neck.

Teyla gasped and clenched her fists in his hair as John sucked on her neck where it met her shoulder, but she barely had time to acknowledge how good his hair felt finally beneath her fingers - especially with his lips on her neck - when he stood up, and captured her lips again.

They lurched out of the gym, lips sealed together, hands roaming, pausing a few times to press each other up against the walls. Teyla knew that she should stop, but all sense of self-control had fled the moment John had kissed her. All she could do was keep kissing him as she allowed herself to be pulled out of the room.

Teyla didn't worry that anyone would see them – this part of the city was mostly deserted except for the gym and some storage rooms, and only Teyla and John really used this particular gym. However, if John was leading them towards his quarters they were bound to run into someone. She had to stop this.

If only she could.

Before she could think any further, though, there came the sound of a door opening and John pulled her into a room. The door slid shut behind them. Teyla opened her eyes. The room was almost pitch black, and she could only assume that it was one of the many store rooms on this corridor.

John seemingly knew where he was going, though, as he started to kiss her again, gently pulling her backwards into the room. Teyla let herself be led as her hands started to roam under his shirt. The darkness of the room only seemed to sharpen her senses, and she revelled in the feel of his muscles under her hands.

John stopped and removed his shirt, then suddenly scooped Teyla up into his arms and laid her down on what felt like a bed. But why would there be a bed in a storage room? Deciding she didn't care, Teyla reached up to guide his lips to hers again.

XOXOXOXOX

Teyla lay with her head resting on John's shoulder, one leg slung over his hip. John's arm was tight around her shoulders, and his hand was stroking her arm.

Teyla didn't know what to say. She had always wanted this with John, but now that it had happened she was frightened. A romantic relationship between them would be complicated, especially now. So much was going on – the war with the Wraith and the Asurans was as terrible as ever, Atlantis had a new home and new leadership, her people were missing…

It would be complicated, yes, but Teyla knew in that moment that it was something she desperately wanted. She and John had always had a special connection, had always been just a step away from this, and now that they had taken that step she knew that she couldn't go back. She only hoped he felt the same.

Teyla lifted her head slightly and peered through the darkness. She could make out the outline of John's profile.

"John?" She said. Her voice sounded impossibly loud in the dark room.

"Hmm?" John replied, turning to look at her. Teyla could just about see his eyes.

Teyla paused, wondering what to say. "What now?" She said eventually.

John leant forward and kissed her on the forehead. Teyla couldn't help a smile escaping at the tender gesture.

"Well," John said. "I have to go… Katie did something to some plants – did you see it?"

John sat up and got out of bed. Teyla also sat up, feeling a little confused. He didn't seem to be regretting what had happened, but he was… he was just leaving. Why?

"Er, yes, I did," Teyla replied.

It sounded like John was pulling on clothes. Teyla swung her legs to the floor and felt around for her own clothes.

"Well, I sent a couple of marines along to help get rid of the things," John was saying. "But I'd better go and see what's going on. Rodney was yelling pretty loudly when I left – he didn't like that Katie had been pushing around those plants while she's pregnant."

Teyla stopped and stared at John. Well, the darkness where his voice was coming from anyway.

"Katie is pregnant?" She repeated in disbelief.

There was a pause. "Yes," John replied, sounding confused. "Teyla, you know she is."

Teyla frowned. She most certainly had _not_ known that Katie was pregnant. Why did John sound so sure that she had?

Teyla concentrated on putting on her clothes.

"Don't forget to meet Sam," John said, his voice muffled by clothing. "She can only stay one night and she really wants to see you."

Teyla paused as she laced up her top. Where was Colonel Carter going?

"This is stupid – I'll put the lights on," John said after a moment. Teyla heard him stride across the room, and she barely had time to wonder how he knew this room so well when the lights came on.

Teyla's jaw dropped. They weren't in a storage room, as she had thought. They were unmistakably in someone's living quarters. John had brought them into someone's living quarters.

But no one lived by the gym, Teyla was sure of it. And this room wasn't like any other living quarters she had seen. For a start, there was not a bed. She saw that what they had been lying on was actually a large sofa, and there were two large armchairs in the room as well. Heavy curtains hung at the windows. A coffee table was strewn with books and magazines and, for some reason, what looked like small multicoloured candles, spilling out of a box labelled 'Crayons'. Several doors led out of the room they stood in.

Teyla looked more closely. There were many other surfaces in the room, and she started to notice the things on them. One was draped with an Athosian cloth very similar to one she had in her quarters. Two large and very obviously Athosian candles stood on top of it. Next to it was a picture in a frame. It was of her and John. They had their arms wrapped round each other, and were smiling widely at the camera. Another frame next to it held a picture of a small boy, with darkly tanned skin and black hair. And John's cocky smile.

Teyla shook her head and took a step backwards. She backed up into another, small table next to the door. Spinning around she saw another picture, this one of herself with a small baby in her arms. She was standing on one of the balconies of Atlantis and smiling down at the infant she was holding.

"Teyla?"

Teyla looked up at John. He had pulled on his t-shirt, and was staring at her, looking concerned. "Are you okay?" He asked.

Teyla opened her mouth to say something, but she couldn't think straight. This couldn't be real. It just couldn't.

John started to take a step towards her, but stopped, frowning. He tapped his earpiece. "What?"

He listened to what was being said to him over his radio, and Teyla saw his eyes widen. "_What?_" He replied, sounding completely disbelieving. "Are you _kidding_?"

John frowned in confusion at Teyla for a split second, before suddenly turning away and picking up his gun holster from where it was lying in the middle of the floor. Before Teyla could even think about moving he took the gun out of the holster and pointed it straight at her head.

"Alright, who are you?" He demanded.

Teyla stared at him and took an instinctive step back. He was standing too far away for her to disarm, and she didn't have a weapon.

"John –"

"That was Chuck," John said. "_Teyla_ just came through the 'gate."

"_What_?"

"So, I ask again – who the hell are _you_?"

Teyla stood there, her hands in the air, her mouth open, not knowing what to say. What the hell was going on!? This _had _to be a dream. It had felt so real, but this… this absolutely couldn't be. And who was this 'Teyla' that had come through the 'gate?

Teyla got the answer to that question almost immediately. The door to the quarters slid open and Teyla's eyes widened as she herself entered the room. If she hadn't known that it wasn't her, there was really no way to tell. This Teyla was wearing full off-world gear, and was slightly out of breath as though she had been running.

Her eyes swept the room and she turned to face John. "John, put down the gun," she said calmly.

John stared at her in confusion. "Teyla… what the hell?" He said.

The new Teyla took another step towards him and put her hand on his arm. "John, put down the gun," she repeated. John's eyes flickered to Teyla, who was still staring at the copy of herself, and then very slowly lowered the gun.

The new Teyla nodded and then turned to look at Teyla, who slowly lowered her hands.

"It's okay," said the new Teyla. "Don't panic, there's an explanation for all of this."

"Teyla, what's going _on_?" John demanded. "Who the hell is this?"

The new Teyla shot a glare over her shoulder. "It is _me_, John," she said. "From four years ago."

Teyla's eyes widened as John's jaw dropped. "Oh my – oh god…" John sank down into one of the armchairs and put his head in his hands.

Teyla forced her eyes back to the copy of herself, who was smiling slightly. "I know you are very confused right now," she said. "And I am afraid I do not have time to explain properly now. Very basically – you are in the future. Four years in the future."

"The future?" Teyla repeated. "You must be joking."

"Look around," the other – future – Teyla said. "You know it is true. But really, time is short. We must leave now so that you can get back. Follow me."

She opened the door again and gestured for Teyla to follow her. Teyla hesitated for a moment, taking one last look around the room, and at John. He looked up at her and managed a weak smile.

"Sorry in advance," he said. "You'd better go."

Feeling more confused than ever, Teyla followed her future self out of the room.

The future Teyla hurried down the corridor towards the transporter. "First we'll go to the locker room to get your things, and then we have to go back to the Beta Site," she said as they got in.

Teyla frowned. "The Beta Site?"

Future Teyla smiled. "PG4-616," she said. "Come on, we only have a few minutes."

They stepped out of the transporter and hurried to the locker room. Teyla quickly changed out of her – _future Teyla's _– civilian clothes and back into her uniform, and then followed her back to the 'gate room.

No one really paid attention to them as they entered the room as Katie and a trolley-full of giant plant were standing before the stargate, which was dialling. However, Rodney hurried over to them as they entered.

He handed a timer to Future Teyla. "You've got two minutes," he said. He looked at Teyla and smiled slightly. "Good luck!"

Teyla smiled weakly. "Thank you, Rodney," she said. Future Teyla nodded. "Yes, thank you," she said.

The wormhole engaged and Chuck's voice sounded over the 'gate room intercom. "Alpha Site dialled," he said. Future Teyla waved up at him and smiled at Teyla.

"Come on," she said. "We must hurry."

Teyla took one last look at the chaos of the giant plant in the 'gate room and the future Atlantis, and then followed her future self through the event horizon.

_To be continued…_


	2. Chapter 2

A/N – I had planned on finishing the story with this chapter but I have a serious case of writer's block when it came to this chapter. A couple of people have asked after this story, though, so I've decided to split the chapter and let you have this one as it is. I'll keep working on it!

_**Chapter Two**_

Teyla couldn't stop staring at her future self as they stood before the stargate on PG4-616. There really was no real difference between the two of them – not that she could see straight away. Her hair was the same length as her own, and she could see no difference in their figures. As far as she could tell the uniform she wore was no different from the ones Teyla wore now, though she was wearing a ring on one finger.

The future Teyla started to dial the stargate. "I will dial Atlantis," she said. "But I have to make sure that the wormhole engages at the exact moment of the solar flare."

Teyla stepped a little closer. "How will you know?" She asked.

Future Teyla held up the timer that Rodney had given her. "Rodney has set this timer for the moment of the solar flare," she explained.

Teyla looked at it – it was counting down from seventeen seconds. She felt a sudden onslaught of fear – what if this didn't work and she couldn't get back?

Future Teyla started dialling again. "Do not worry, it will work," she said. She smiled. "Trust me – I stood there, four years ago and listened to myself say these very words." She raised her eyebrows and shook her head. "This is a very strange experience."

Teyla managed a weak smile. The timer now read five seconds. Future Teyla finished dialling and the wormhole engaged just as the timer hit zero.

Future Teyla turned to face her. "Well, good luck," she said. "And… do not worry. Everything will be alright."

Teyla nodded dumbly, unable to think of anything to say. Future Teyla nodded back. "You must go – there is no need to send an IDC. Good bye Teyla."

Teyla took a deep breath and walked through the stargate.

PG4-616 looked the same as it had before she walked through the 'gate, though now she noticed that the sky now was overcast and the wind had picked up. She was back.

Teyla turned to the DHD, but instead of dialling she placed both hands on the rim and leant against it, taking several deep breaths.

It wasn't a dream… it had actually happened. She had travelled into the future. She had been to an Atlantis that wouldn't exist for four years. She had seen herself in the future.

She had slept with John.

Teyla shook her head and stood up straight. How was she going to face him? She wouldn't – _couldn't_ – tell him what happened between them, no matter how much she wanted to. It was not as though he was going to just sweep her up into his arms when he heard about it. They did not have that kind of relationship; everything was too complicated.

Except that it didn't seem to be that complicated in four years' time. She remembered the pictures she had seen in that room – a room that they obviously shared. The pictures of them together, arms around each other. And the picture of her with a baby. They had a _baby_. Their relationship obviously grew to be much more than just friends, but Teyla would just have to wait for their relationship to progress naturally.

But what if this incident was what spurred their relationship on? It might be that they took that final step because of her trip to the future, and if she did not tell him of it they might never start a real relationship.

Perhaps she _should_ tell him.

"Teyla?"

Teyla's breath caught in her throat and she spun round. John and Rodney had appeared over the crest of the hill. The scene was so much like the one she had experienced in the future that she lost all powers of speech as her team-mates walked towards her.

John was looking straight at her, and Teyla looked away, unable to meet his gaze. Her mind was full of memories of what they had done… what they _would _do. This was very confusing.

When they were a little closer, John spoke up again. "What are you still doing here?"

Teyla tried desperately to think of something to say, any excuse would do. "I… er… I just took a long time to get to the 'gate," she said. "There was… there were some flowers that reminded me of Athos…"

She risked a glance at John, who was frowning slightly, and decided to change the subject. "Why are you going back?" She asked. "Where is Ronon?"

"I left him babysitting," he said. "Rodney wants to get back to check on some experiments. I'm going to send Major Lorne to relieve Ronon – he asked for it yesterday when he won all that money off me." He smiled slightly and Teyla turned away quickly, not wanting to remember the smiles he had given her a few hours ago… four years from now.

"Come on, let's get going," Rodney said, stepping up to the DHD and starting to dial. Teyla watched him, carefully avoiding looking at John. She realised in that moment that she couldn't possibly tell him what had happened – she couldn't even look at him. No, she would just keep it to herself and carry on as though nothing had happened.

She would trust her future self – _everything will be alright_.

XOXOXOXOX

The next few weeks were torture for Teyla. She did not how she could have thought everything would turn out well – how could it possibly? Everywhere she turned there were reminders of what had happened in the future, and it was… distracting… to say the least.

Teyla tried not to make it obvious that she was avoiding John, even though she could barely spend more than a few minutes in his company. Luckily everyone on Atlantis was very busy, not least John, and she was able to avoid him quite easily.

Teyla devoted herself to finding her people. She went off-world more than any other person on Atlantis, joining as many missions as possible and pushing herself to the limit. She had a feeling that John had interceded on her behalf with Colonel Carter to make sure she was able to go off-world when she needed to.

It was about five weeks after her trip to the future that Teyla started to sense something was wrong. She felt nauseous and had little energy. She was sick nearly every morning and there were very few foods that didn't make her feel very ill. Teyla tried not to let her illness show – she was sure that it was worry, and did not want anyone to think that she was not able to handle the situation.

After five days, though, Teyla knew she had to do something.

Teyla went to see Dr Kellar as late in the day as possible, when the night shift was due to come on and there were not many people around the infirmary. She found the doctor at her desk, filling out paperwork.

"Dr Kellar, may I speak to you?" She asked.

Dr Kellar jumped slightly but smiled up at her. "Of course, Teyla, what can I do for you?" She replied.

Teyla glanced around the room. There were very few people, but still too many.

"May we speak… privately?" She asked.

Dr Kellar nodded and stood up. "Let's go into the exam room," she said. She led the way through a doorway and into an empty, smaller room. She shut the door behind them.

"Is something wrong, Teyla?" She asked.

Teyla hesitated for a moment. "I… I have been feeling rather ill, for the last few days," she said.

Dr Kellar raised an eyebrow. "I'm not surprised," she said. "You've been running yourself ragged these last few weeks – I can't believe you haven't passed out in the 'gate room!"

Teyla sighed and perched on the edge of the bed. "I have been very busy," she said. "I have had a lot to do…"

"I know, Teyla, I know," said Dr Kellar soothingly. Teyla nodded. She knew Dr Kellar understood – she had been with her on New Athos when she had made her horrific discovery about her missing people.

"So, tell me your symptoms," said Dr Kellar, motioning for her to sit on the bed properly as she started to examine her.

"Well, I've been feeling very tired," she said. "And nauseous. Most food makes me feel sick."

Dr Kellar nodded. "Have you been sick at all?"

"Yes," said Teyla. "I have been sick every morning for the past five days."

Dr Kellar stepped back and looked at her thoughtfully. There was a moment's silence, and Teyla shifted uncomfortably under her scrutiny.

"Teyla, is there any possibility that you might be pregnant?"

Teyla's memory went into overdrive as she thought about her trip to the future and what had happened. But there wasn't any way she could be… could she? She hadn't even considered the possibility that she might be pregnant. But now, thinking of her sickness, Teyla realised that she was experiencing exactly what she had seen dozens of other women experience when they were expecting a child.

She was pregnant. With John's baby. Teyla closed her eyes and let her head fall into her hands.

She felt Dr Kellar's hand on her shoulder. "I take that as a yes?" She said.

Teyla couldn't speak. She just nodded.

"Right, well, let me take some blood and I'll run a test," she said. Teyla took a deep breath to fight down the bile suddenly rising in her throat. She felt a dozen different emotions fighting for dominance in her chest. Disbelief. Fear. Worry. Happiness.

Teyla lowered her hands and allowed Dr Kellar to take some blood.

"I'll have the results in a couple of hours," she said as she labelled the vial.

"Dr Kellar, I would appreciate it if…"

"I won't say a word to anyone, Teyla," she said with a smile. "I'll run the tests myself."

Teyla sighed in relief. "Thank you, Jennifer," she said.

Dr Kellar smiled again. "I'll radio you when the results are in," she said.

Teyla sat on the bed in the exam room after Dr Kellar left, staring at the wall opposite her, still unsure what she should be feeling about this.

She was pregnant, she was sure of it. As soon as Dr Kellar had voiced the possibility something in Teyla's heart had told her that it was true. She was going to have a baby, and despite the timing of her pregnancy and the knowledge that raising a child would be sure to interfere with her duties on Atlantis, Teyla couldn't help feeling… happy.

But how was she going to tell John?

Teyla closed her eyes and shook her head. It was a question that she had no answer to. Telling him she was pregnant would be hard enough. Explaining to him that he was the father would be almost impossible.

The hair on the back of Teyla's neck stood on end as she became aware someone was watching her. She knew who it was before she looked up.

"Hey Teyla, are you alright?"

Teyla stared at John, unable to move. He was leaning against the doorframe to the exam room, his hands in his pockets, looking at her with his face full of concern.

Teyla desperately tried to think of an excuse for sitting in the infirmary exam room by herself. She was just glad she was wearing a jacket, which covered up the band-aid on her arm from the blood test. She hastily stood up.

"Yes, I am fine," she said. "What are you doing here?"

John glanced over his shoulder into the infirmary. "Rodney drank something with lime in it," he said. "He demanded to be brought to the infirmary."

"Is he alright?"

"He's _fine_," John said, very loudly, directing his voice over his shoulder again.

"I am _not_ fine!" Teyla heard Rodney answer from the main infirmary. "My throat is starting to seize up – do something!"

John rolled his eyes and turned back to Teyla. "So, why are you here?" He asked. "Are you ill?"

Teyla could feel her face heating up as she tried to think of an excuse. At that moment, though, Dr Kellar returned, obviously drawn back to the infirmary by Rodney's yelling.

"Teyla, I'm sorry but I'm going to have to stay here," she said, appearing in the doorway behind John. "Can we have dinner some other time?"

Teyla felt like hugging the doctor, but she settled for a smile and a nod. "Of course, that is fine," she said. Now to make her escape.

"Well, since my dinner was interrupted by citrus-boy over there, you wanna join me?" Said John as Dr Kellar left.

Damn, so much for an escape. Teyla blinked at him, racking her brain for some reason why she couldn't.

John took a step towards her and Teyla forced herself not to take a step back. "Come on Teyla," he said cajolingly. "You know it's weird – I feel like I haven't seen you in _weeks_."

Teyla's heart ached. Things were never going to be the same for them again. Her trip to the future had already made things awkward, but she had hoped that eventually she and John would be able to be friends again. Now she was pregnant and everything was going to be different, forever.

John was still looking at Teyla with what Rodney called his 'puppy-dog' eyes, and Teyla's resistance fled. She missed him terribly. And as soon as he found out what had happened… would happen… he wouldn't want anything to do with her.

Teyla desperately wanted to spend time with John, just once more, but… she couldn't. She just couldn't bring herself to sit across from him in the commissary and pretend that nothing was wrong.

"I… I can not, John," she said. "I had actually intended to tell Dr Kellar that I could not have dinner with her."

"Oh?"

Teyla nodded. "I… I have many mission reports to complete," she said. "I have been so busy…"

John's face fell and Teyla's heart all but broke. She started to walk past him, needing to get away. "I am sorry," she said.

John nodded glumly. "No problem," he said. "I guess I'll see you later."

Teyla paused briefly. She tried to smile, but she couldn't. The enormity of the situation was washing over her, and she had to leave. Managing to nod again, she hurried out of the infirmary.

_TBC_

_Please review._


	3. Chapter 3

_Spoilers for Missing and The Seer_

_**Chapter Three**_

Teyla lay in bed, watching the patterns of the moonlight as it played on the ceiling of her quarters, reflecting off the ocean outside.

_Complicated_. It was, as Rodney would say, the 'understatement of the century'. But she had been unable to say anything else, as at that moment John had walked in with Colonel Carter, with more questions for Davos. Teyla had made a quick exit.

It had been a week since Dr Keller had confirmed Teyla's pregnancy, but she had yet to tell John or anyone else on Atlantis. The doctor had been incredibly kind and understanding – she gave Teyla advice and support, but didn't press her for the identity of the father or try and force her to tell Colonel Carter. Teyla was hugely grateful to her.

But however understanding Dr Keller was to her situation, Teyla wished she had someone else to confide in, to ask what to do. But she had no one. Her people were still missing – 'shrouded in darkness'. Even amongst them, though, she had few confidants, especially now that Charin was gone.

On Atlantis, there was no one Teyla felt comfortable confiding in. Ronon and Rodney were no use – they would be shocked beyond belief, and neither were particularly in tune with their emotions. She wished fervently that Elizabeth was still in the city – she was sure that her friend would have known what to do, and how to tell John.

_Tell John_. The very idea made Teyla cold. How could she possibly tell him she was pregnant with a child he would not sire for four years?

And yet, he had to be told, and soon. Teyla knew that it was unfair to keep him in the dark about his own child, and she could not go on keeping it a secret from Colonel Carter and the rest of the expedition. They all had a right to know the truth.

She would have to tell him tomorrow.

_Complicated. _The understatement of the century.

_XXXXX_

Teyla did not fall asleep for a long time, and was woken up early with her morning sickness. When she felt a little better she showered and dressed, and decided that it was better to get it over with, rather than continuing to walk around with such a terrible weight on her shoulders.

It was still quite early, so Teyla made her way down the corridor to John's quarters. She took a deep, calming breath (which did nothing to calm her) and knocked.

She heard footsteps inside and had to forcibly keep her feet from carrying her away. The door slid open and John was standing in front of her. He was dressed, but barefoot, and had a toothbrush in his mouth.

"Oh, I am sorry, I will come back –" Teyla started to back away.

John shook his head and motioned for her to come in. He disappeared back into his room and Teyla followed slowly, the door closing behind her. She could hear the sound of running water and a moment later John walked back over to her.

"Hey, sorry about that," he said. He frowned suddenly. "Are you okay?"

Teyla's eyes widened at the look of concern on his face. "I am fine," she said. "Why?"

John shrugged. "Sorry, you look kind of… tired," he said. Teyla had a feeling he was being diplomatic.

"I am fine," she repeated. _Now or never_. "But I have to tell you something."

There, no backing out now.

John's eyebrows went up. "Sure. Have a seat," he said, gesturing to his couch.

Teyla walked over the couch and gratefully sank down onto it. She was not sure her legs would not have supported her for much longer – her entire body felt like jelly. "Thank you," she said.

John sat down on his bed and clasped his hands together, elbows on knees. "What's up?"

_Now or never, now or never, now or never… _"I am pregnant," she said.

John's expression didn't change. Instead it froze as he stared at her. "Oh," he said, sounding only mildly surprised. "Right."

Teyla waited for him to say something else, but he did not. He glanced down at her stomach and then quickly looked away, down at the floor. His face was expressionless but his eyes betrayed him – his mind was reeling. Teyla waited a couple of seconds and then spoke.

"John?" He blinked and looked back up at her.

"Sorry," he said "Uh… congratulations…"

Teyla was the one to look away now, suddenly very embarrassed again. John was such a gentleman, she knew that he was debating whether to ask her the question.

When John spoke again his voice was oddly gruff. "I don't know if maybe you don't want to tell me because you want to, I don't know – um –"

"Who is the father?" Teyla said quietly.

"Yeah." John's voice shook slightly on the word.

Teyla knew that these were two of the most important words she would ever say. She looked up at John again and took a deep breath. "You are," she said.

John's expression changed for the first time in the conversation, his face creasing in confusion. "_What_?"

Teyla gripped the edge of the couch tightly as she tried to explain. "I know it seems… impossible… but –"

"Yeah!" John exclaimed. "Teyla, what are you _talking_ about? How could _I_ be the father?"

He was confused. And very nervous. She looked at him sympathetically and sighed. "This is a… strange story," she said.

John's eyes narrowed. "I'll bet," he said.

Teyla tried to think of the best place to start. "Weeks ago, when we were on PG4-616, you sent me back to the 'gate early," she said.

"I remember."

Teyla nodded. "I dialled Atlantis and sent through my IDC and went through. However, it did not work, and I was still on PG4-616," she said. John frowned, but Teyla hastened to continue.

"I do not know anything about the stargate, so I decided to just try again. I was just about to dial again when you and Rodney arrived. You seemed surprised to see me –"

"Because I thought you'd left," John put in.

Teyla nodded again. "That's what I thought," she said. "We went through to Atlantis and this time it worked. I meant to tell Rodney what had happened but he left quickly and so I went to the locker room to change so I could spar."

John shook his head. "That's not what happened," he said. "We went and spoke to Sam while Rodney went off to check - wait a minute – were you in another reality?"

Teyla shook her head, glad that he believed her. "No," she said.

John didn't look convinced. "Because that can happen…" he said.

Teyla took another deep breath. "I was in the future," she said. "Four years into the future."

John blinked at her. "The future," he said simply.

Teyla nodded. "I have done some reading about it, and if a solar flare occurs when a wormhole… I do not understand exactly how –"

"But time travel is possible using the stargate," said John, looking into the distance again.

"Yes."

"It happened to SG-1."

"I know."

John's eyes flickered back to Teyla. "So you were in the future," he said.

"Yes, but I didn't realise at first," said Teyla.

John looked amazed. "You didn't?"

"No," said Teyla. Her heart was starting to beat very fast – the next part was the hardest part of the story to tell. "Not much has changed," she said. "Except that… we are…"

John looked confused for a moment, and then his eyes widened. "We are?" He said, and Teyla nodded. He looked away.

Teyla had to say it, and she had to say it now. She started speaking very quickly, barely pausing to breathe.

"I did not know that it was the future, and everyone there thought that I was the Teyla from that time because she was off-world and so when I saw you – the you from the future – you – he – thought that I was her and he –"

John cut her off. "You're _kidding_," he said sharply. "You slept with him?"

Teyla forced herself to look straight at John. "Yes," she replied.

John was gaping at her, obviously shocked beyond belief. He shook his head slightly, still staring at her. "And now you're pregnant," he said, his voice very quiet.

Teyla nodded. "Yes," she said, also very quietly.

John nodded and looked away. "Right," he said.

Teyla watched him closely, waiting for him to say something else, but he just sat there, staring at the wall. She could not imagine what he was thinking, or think of anything to say that seemed appropriate or consoling.

She swallowed. "You're the first person I've told, but I need to tell Colonel Carter," she said, her voice little more than a whisper.

John nodded, still not looking at her. "Right," he said again.

Teyla reached out a hand. "John…"

John jumped to his feet before she could touch him, and Teyla snatched her hand back. He ran his hand through his hair and stared out of the window. "I need to – um – I just need to go," he said, walking towards the door. "See ya," he called over his shoulder.

Teyla watched the doors slide shut behind him and felt tears well up in her eyes.

"Bye."

_XXXXXX_

John paused outside Teyla's door, raised his hand to knock, and then spun on his heel and walked away. He stopped again after five steps, turned round again and walked back to her door. He tapped his foot nervously, his hands stuffed into his pockets. He shook his head and turned on his heel again, only to do a strange 360˚ turn and raise his hand to knock again. This time his hand got within an inch of the door before he dropped his hand and turned away again. He started to walk away, shaking his head.

"Colonel?"

John froze. It was Teyla. Well, that was good, that's why he was here, to talk to her, but still… he wasn't sure he could bring himself to turn around. It had taken him four hours to get to this point, but now that he was here he thought that maybe he needed a few more hours.

She was _pregnant_. Teyla was _pregnant_. She was going to have a baby, a baby that was… well, _his_. He couldn't get his head round it.

John knew he had to turn around, and forced his body to comply. Teyla was standing next to the door of her quarters, looking at him from over the top of about fifty mission report files that she had balanced in her arms.

John hurried over to her. "What are you doing – give me those!" He said, snatching the pile of reports from her arms. "You can't go round carrying things this heavy – do you feel alright?"

Teyla was staring at him as though he'd grown a second head. He could feel his face heating up and he cleared his throat, feeling like a complete idiot. "Er, can we talk?" He asked.

Teyla nodded. "Of course," she said. She swiped her hand over the control crystal and the doors to her quarters slid open. She walked into the room, and John followed her.

He deposited the mission reports on her desk. He turned around and saw Teyla was standing in the middle of the room, watching him closely. John put his hands in his pockets and rocked on his heels slightly. "So, er, why do you need all these mission reports?" He asked, trying to ease the tension slightly.

"I want to read through them, and double-check them all for any mention of my people," she said.

John nodded. It was a pointless task – everyone on Atlantis knew to tell Teyla if they found out _anything_ about the Athosians, but he knew she needed to feel like she was doing something.

"So…" John said again. "Listen, I'm sorry."

Teyla raised her eyebrows. "For what?" She said.

John stared at her. "For my behaviour this morning. I shouldn't have just walked out like that," he said. He smiled slightly. "If it makes you feel any better, I looked pretty stupid walking around with no shoes on."

Teyla looked away. "There is no need to apologise, Colonel," she said. John noted the use of his rank, rather than his name. She was still annoyed with him.

He opened his mouth to apologise again, but Teyla beat him to it. "It is I who should be apologising," she said. "I can not imagine what you must be thinking. It must have come as quite a shock."

John opened his mouth to negate it, but decided against it. He shrugged. "Well, yeah," he said.

Teyla looked down at the floor in front of John's feet. "I am sorry, Colonel," she said. John stared at her. She wasn't calling him Colonel because she was annoyed, she was calling him Colonel because she was ashamed.

John wanted to say something to make her feel better about what happened, but he didn't actually _know _what had happened – not really. And there was _no way _he was going to ask for details.

"Have you told Sam yet?" He asked, deciding a change of subject was needed.

Teyla looked up and shook her head.

"Okay, so let's do that today," said John. The sooner he wasn't the only one who knew about this the better.

Teyla looked surprised. "You are coming too?" She said.

"Of course I… well, unless you don't want me to," John replied.

Teyla shook her head. "No – I mean, I would be very happy for you to come with me," she said. "Thank you."

John nodded. "Right, well, after lunch, then?" He said. _Please not now, please not now…_

Teyla nodded. "Yes, but I have already eaten," she said.

"Well, I haven't," said John quickly. "Shall I meet you at Sam's office in half an hour?"

He barely gave Teyla time to nod before giving her a small smile and striding out of the room. He was unbelievably glad that Teyla hadn't wanted lunch as well, because he had just had to get out of there. He had decided, in his four hours of brooding, that if nothing else Teyla was his friend and he had to help her out and support her, but he was finding it quite hard to be gracious about the situation.

It was eating him from the inside out, and he wasn't sure why. It wasn't just that she was pregnant – though his head was reeling from that knowledge alone – there was something else, something that was making his stomach attack itself with anger and frustration.

Half an hour later, after staring at a sandwich in the commissary, John was regretting his offer to help Teyla tell Sam about her pregnancy. It had seemed like the right thing to do at the time, but now he wasn't so sure.

Still, though, he couldn't back out now. So despite his misgivings he made his way to Sam's office.

Teyla was waiting for him in the Control Room, which was mercifully empty except for Chuck and one other technician. Teyla gave John a tight smile when he arrived, but he felt unable to return it.

"Okay, let's go," he said. He led the way across the bridge and into Sam's office.

Sam smiled at them warmly as they entered and asked them to have a seat. John took the seat next to Teyla in front of the desk and then hoped that she would speak first because he had no idea how to start this conversation.

"What can I do for you?" Sam asked.

Teyla took a deep breath. "I… I have come to tell you that I am pregnant," she said.

Sam's eyes widened in shock and she stared at Teyla, though John didn't miss the way her eyes flickered to him for a split second.

Sam was clearly flabbergasted. "I… um, right," she said. "Well… congratulations Teyla. Er… how far along are you?"

"About five weeks," said Teyla.

Sam glanced at John again, this time a lot more obviously. He knew exactly what she was thinking, and felt a surge of anger at the implication. He didn't want everyone thinking that he was the kind of guy who would go around screwing members of his team, though he knew that's exactly what this was going to look like.

And his coming to this meeting with Teyla wasn't exactly making it look like he had nothing to do with this situation. This was a _bad idea_.

Sam nodded. "Right," she said. She turned to look at John. "So, er, when did you find out about this, John?" She asked.

"This morning," said John. He narrowed his eyes. "And you can stop looking at me like that, Sam, I'm not the father," he said.

John felt Teyla shift in her seat next to him, but he kept his eyes on Sam. "Not technically, anyway," he said gruffly.

Sam frowned. "What do you mean by that?" She asked. She looked at Teyla again.

"Teyla travelled into the future using the stargate when we were first on PG4-616 and wound up on Atlantis and slept with the John Sheppard from the future and then came back and didn't tell anyone, including me, and now she's pregnant," said John.

Sam's eyes grew wider and wider with every word he said, but he wasn't finished.

"So you see I am _not _the father, though the baby will presumably have half of my DNA, but that's about as far as this connection goes," he said, his voice considerably louder than it needed to be.

"John!" Sam exclaimed, looking at him in shock.

John shut his mouth. He didn't feel any better after his little outburst, though he was pretty sure that he'd now figured out what was bothering him so much.

"I've gotta go," he said, standing up. He thought for a moment that Sam was going to order him to stay, but she just continued to look at him in shock. He turned on his heel and practically ran out of the office, not daring to even glance at Teyla.

John stormed through the corridors of Atlantis. He saw several people who looked like they wanted to speak to him, but no one tried to. Instead everyone seemed to jump out of his way, which he was very glad of. He took a transporter to a part of the city as far away from Sam's office as possible, and didn't stop walking until he stepped out onto a large balcony at the end of a deserted corridor.

Once outside, John took a deep breath of the cool air and leant on the balcony, staring down at the water below.

He felt like a complete and utter idiot. He felt like shooting something. He felt like jumping into the ocean.

He was _jealous_!

John couldn't believe it. He'd figured out what was bothering him – and he was jealous!

He thought back to that morning, when Teyla had first told him she was pregnant, and how he'd felt. _Before _she had told him about her jaunt through time.

He had felt like his whole world was crashing down around him. All he had been able to think about was that Teyla had slept with someone, that she had a secret lover. That he was a complete idiot for ever thinking that the two of them could be more than friends.

Then he had found out that he was _technically _the father and shock had taken over as the principle emotion. But the jealousy had remained unnoticed, and that was what had been eating away at him.

He knew it was stupid, that it was technically _him_ that Teyla had slept with, but it _hadn't _been him! It had been some other guy, some guy he didn't know and might not ever be. Time travel was a weird thing – what about that random camera they found in a tomb in Egypt with SG-1 on it from thousands of years ago?

Teyla remembered it all, she had experienced it; he hadn't. He wouldn't.

Why hadn't she said anything to him? Why hadn't she told him about it? She hadn't said a word, hadn't dropped a _hint_. In fact, John suddenly realised, she had been avoiding him for weeks now. He hadn't noticed it, because they had both been so busy, but now it was obvious she hadn't even wanted to spend any time with him after what happened.

So what was so great about the guy she met in the future that made him so terrible by comparison she couldn't even talk to him?

John didn't want to think about it. Knowing that it was some version of him made it so much worse somehow, because it made it seem so close yet so far. Why _hadn't_ it been him?

And now she was pregnant. It always came back to that. No matter what John felt about it, and about Teyla, she was going to have a baby, and he was the closest thing to a father the baby would have. How could he walk away from that?

John knew he couldn't. He wouldn't. He would be there for the kid, no matter how it had come about, and no matter what he felt about its mother.

John ran his hands through his hair. When did things get so complicated?

_TBC_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Chapter Four**_

Teyla sat on one of Atlantis' many balconies, watching the sun sink lower and lower in the sky. She had come out here to find some peace of mind, but though she was alone, her mind was far from peaceful.

She could not stop thinking about what had happened earlier, in Colonel Carter's office. She had known that John had not entirely come to terms with her pregnancy, but she never would have expected him to lose his temper in front of his superior officer.

Colonel Carter had been very shocked by John's outburst, and Teyla had been left feeling incredibly guilty. John had taken her news hard.

Should she have told him? He was so angry, Teyla felt as though he was never going to _look_ at her again, let alone talk to her.

Earlier, when he had come to find her at her quarters, she had believed that everything would be alright; that John had accepted her pregnancy and understood. But their meeting with Colonel Carter had proven that this was not the case.

After John had left her office Colonel Carter had asked her to elaborate on what John had said, and Teyla had told her the whole story. The Colonel had been full of understanding and sympathy, and Teyla had been grateful for her kindness. Colonel Carter had agreed to keep her pregnancy quiet, but had advised her to tell Rodney and Ronon, as she would soon have to cut back her mission load.

Teyla had agreed. She would tell Rodney and Ronon – she _wanted _to – but not until she had straightened things out with John.

Teyla sighed. It was early evening now, and she was hungry. It was only this time of day that her nausea dissipated enough for her to eat a substantial meal and she knew her body needed food now more than ever.

She got up and left the balcony.

Her way to the commissary took her past the gym, a place that Teyla had been trying to avoid since her trip to the future. But she was so lost in her thoughts that she let her feet carry her through the city from memory, and she soon found herself in the corridor outside the gym.

She paused when she realised where she was, staring at the door of the gym. Then, very slowly, she looked to her left.

She had stopped right in front of the door to the room the future John had taken her into.

Teyla hesitated, but curiosity got the better of her and she swiped her hand over the control crystal on the wall. The door to the room slid open, and Teyla stepped inside.

As she had thought, the room was being used for storage. It was full of empty crates, which had obviously been used to transport things from Earth on the Daedalus, and had been discarded and forgotten.

The door closed behind Teyla but as there were no curtains on the windows evening sunlight still poured through the glass, highlighting the dust floating on the air. Teyla stepped in further. There were four doors leading off the room, and Teyla opened each of them one by one. One led to a bathroom. The other three led to plain rooms, each of which had crates in them. The largest of the three rooms had a door that led to a small balcony.

Teyla walked over to one of the windows in the main room. The windows were set back in the walls like the one in the gym, and so had window seats. Teyla leant one knee on the window seat and wiped some of the dust on the window away. The view was beautiful – you could see the entire East Pier.

Teyla was sure that these rooms had been used as living quarters when the Ancestors had lived in the city, and it made her so sad to see it now, being used for nothing more than storage. Especially as she had seen how it could be in the future, and how much of a home it had become.

Teyla did not think such a thing could happen now.

"Um, hi, Teyla."

Teyla's head snapped round so fast she almost broke her neck. John was standing in the open doorway, looking so tense she thought he was liable to snap at any moment.

"I, er, I was looking for you in the gym, and I saw the crystals were lit up for this room," he said, stepping into the room. The doors slid shut behind him.

"What are you doing in here?" He asked.

Teyla swallowed. "Exploring," she said. It was a rather simplified version of the truth, but she did not want to drive John away again. Perhaps at least their friendship could survive this mess.

John nodded. "It's funny, we're in the gym so much but I don't think I've ever been in here," he said, looking around the room. Looking at anything but her.

"It's quite a nice room, really, looks like it was living quarters once," John said, walking over to one of the doors and opening it. "Hey, look at this – this must be a bedroom… there's a balcony and everything… and an en-suite bathroom – this place is nice! Better not let Rodney see it or he'll be moved in like a shot…"

Teyla sat down on the window seat and watched silently as John moved around the room, giving his opinion on everything. She knew he was only talking so much because he was nervous, but she was afraid to say something first, even if it was to try and put him at ease. She did not know what he had come to tell her, and she did not want to unknowingly prevent him from saying it.

After a few minutes John stopped walking and turned to face her, his hands stuffed in his pockets.

"I guess I should be apologising again," he said.

Teyla shook her head slightly and looked down.

"I, er, I'm sorry that I acted like I did in front of Sam," he said. "I'm kind of having trouble with the whole… time travel thing."

Teyla nodded, and decided she _definitely_ was not going to tell him what had happened in this room.

"I understand," she said quietly.

John rocked on his heels. "I just… I want you to know that I'll do whatever I can to help," he said, very quickly. "With whatever you need. I mean, it's my kid too, even if, if…" His voice trailed off uncertainly.

Teyla knew exactly what he had been going to say, and her heart constricted painfully. "You do not feel that the child is really yours," she said.

John's ears went red. "It's not that… I…" he stammered.

Teyla smiled sadly. "It is alright John," she said. "I understand. Really."

For a moment John looked like he was going to argue, but the moment soon passed. "Right," he said. "Okay." He scuffed the floor with his boot and nodded to the door. "I'll… I'll see you later then," he said.

He turned to leave. Teyla watched his retreating back, her heart heavy. At least he had stayed calm. Perhaps things would be alright, eventually.

John paused as he raised his hand towards the control crystal and turned around again to face her.

"What happened?" He asked.

Teyla blinked. "Pardon?"

John looked straight at her. "When you were in the… how did it happen?" He asked. "Why did you… sleep with him?"

Teyla's eyes widened and she felt her face flush. "I… it just happened," she stammered. John had a steely glint in his eye, and Teyla knew he needed a fuller answer.

She swallowed nervously. "I was in the gym, and y-he came in and sat down next to me," she said. Her eyes closed briefly as she remembered the way John had smiled at her. "And you started talking to me –"

"It wasn't me." Teyla looked up at the hard tone of John's voice. He looked angry.

"Don't you see, Teyla, it _wasn't me_!" He exclaimed, taking a step towards her. "It was someone completely different, someone you'd never even met before, and you just slept with him!"

Teyla could not believe what she was hearing. "I –" she began, but John cut her off.

"Look, I'm sorry, I just can't get it out of my mind, okay?" He said, his voice rising in volume. "I know I've never… that we've never… I know I don't have a right to say anything, but I –"

Teyla was starting to get annoyed. How did he not understand? "John –" she tried again.

John shook his head. "I have to go," he said, turning around again.

"John, I thought it was you!" Teyla cried out, standing up. "Do you not understand? I thought that it was you!"

He really believed that she had known it was not him; that she had known what was happening and slept with him anyway!

John turned back to face her again, and Teyla glared at him.

"I thought it was you that sat down next to me, that it was you who was talking to me, and when he kissed me, I thought it was you! Do you think that I would have slept with any man that kissed me?" Teyla paused, her glare deepening. "Is that what you really think of me?"

John looked highly uncomfortable. "Teyla –"

This time Teyla cut _him_ off.

"Have I _ever_ given you any reason to think that of me?" She asked in disbelief. "When have I ever given you the impression that I would do such a thing?"

John was bright red and his eyes were wide with shock. "Teyla, I –"

Teyla's throat was thick with unshed tears. How could he think so little of her? "I have let very few men get close to me in my life, John, and I have never felt for them what I feel for you," she said, taking a step closer to him, rage making her hands tremble.

"Since the moment I met you I have been waiting for you to realise how much I love you!" Teyla took another step forward.

"Do you know how I felt when I realised it was not you I had given myself to? How much it hurt to spend time with you these past weeks, remembering how it had felt but knowing that you could not? How it feels to be carrying your child, but… but you not…" Tears sprang to Teyla's eyes, and she let her voice trail off.

She had to get out of the room before she started to cry. She did not want to see her lose more control than she already had.

Teyla hurried past John without looking at him, and swiped her hand over the control crystal. Nothing happened. She tried again, and still there was no effect.

For a moment, Teyla thought the door was broken. Then she glanced over at John and saw how still he was, and the look of concentration in his eyes.

"John, let me out," she said through gritted teeth.

John was staring at her. "Are you really in love with me?" He asked.

Teyla stared at him. "_What?_" She asked, flabbergasted. Then her memory caught up with her and she realised what she had said.

John took a step towards her. "Are you? Really?" He repeated.

Tears were threatening to fall from Teyla's eyes. "Let me out John," she said pleadingly, her throat constricting tightly as she forced back the sob trying to escape.

"Teyla…" John took another step towards Teyla, so that he was barely a foot away from her. Teyla instinctively raised her hands defensively, ready to push him back if she needed to, and he reached out and caught hold of her wrists.

Teyla gasped. It did not hurt, but it was a shock nonetheless.

John was staring at her, a fierce look in his eye. Teyla forced herself not to look away.

"I love you too," said John. Teyla's eyes widened and she shook her head, not daring to believe him.

John kept staring at her. "I do, I really do," he said. "That's why I've – look, I know I've been an idiot," he closed his eyes briefly, as if the memory caused him pain.

"All I could think about was you and me and how you'd experienced something that I hadn't and I kept wondering why _we _hadn't… I was so jealous."

Teyla gaped at him, barely able to breathe. "John –"

John inched in closer and rested his forehead against hers. His grip on her writs lessened but he didn't let go. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I'm really sorry."

Teyla stared at him. She could not believe this was happening. She could not believe that she could achieve such a happy ending.

Teyla twisted her wrists out of John's grasp. He lifted his forehead and, his face full of sadness, started to step back. Teyla placed her now free hands on his shoulders and kissed him.

It took John a moment to realise what was happening, but he soon responded to the kiss, his hands moving around her back and pulling her tighter against him. Teyla teased his lips open with her tongue and he groaned into her mouth as their tongues met for what she realised was the first time – from his point of view.

John backed Teyla up a couple of steps until she was flush against the door with his body pressing up against hers. Suddenly, without warning, the door began to slide open. They stumbled and broke apart.

Teyla looked up at John. His eyes were slightly glazed over and his hair was even more messy than usual. He smiled sheepishly.

"Whoops," he said. "I guess my concentration slipped."

Teyla raised an eyebrow. "Well, I hope that you get it back," she said. "You are going to need it."

John smirked as she took hold of his hand in his. "I am?" He asked.

Teyla smiled. "Yes," she affirmed, leading him out into the corridor. "I would hate for you to miss out on any… experiences."


	5. Epilogue

_And so, we come to the end… Thank you to everyone who reviewed, and don't forget to let me know what you think of the end! _

_Ruby xx_

_**Epilogue**_

"John, let me help you with that –"

"No!"

John narrowed his eyes at Teyla ferociously. Teyla rolled her eyes and took a step back, her hands up in defeat. "Fine, break you back," she said.

"Thanks, I will," said John, his voice strained. He staggered into the room under the weight of an enormous crate and dropped the thing on the low table. Teyla watched as he leant on the crate and took a couple of deep breaths, then slowly straightened up to look at her.

She knew exactly what he was going to say. He raised an accusing finger at her. "No heavy lifting," he said. Teyla mouthed the words along with him.

John scowled at her. "Okay missy, you just sit your heavily-pregnant wise-ass _down_," he said, pointing at the couch behind her.

Teyla rolled her eyes again but obediently lowered herself onto the couch – no mean feat these days, as she was eight months pregnant.

"I am _pregnant_, John," she said. "Not an invalid."

John was still scowling. "I know that," he said. "But _no heavy lifting_!"

"I was not going to take the crate off of you!" She said, exasperated. "I was just going to help!"

"I don't care. Now, you're just going to sit there until I've finished moving this stuff - to make sure you don't feel tempted to exert yourself," John said. He looked around the room. It had been cleaned from top to bottom, and the furniture that had been in there was arranged where they wanted it. But they had had to move in a lot of other furniture and of course all of their belongings.

"Only two more crates," he said.

Teyla watched him walk towards the closed door. "John, leave them for now," she said. "We should probably start unpacking these crates first." There were several already in the room, as well as several large bags containing clothes.

John paused. "I don't know," he said. "It's probably better to just get it all done now."

"John, you've been running around all day," Teyla said. "Come and sit down with me."

John smirked and leant one shoulder against the wall next to the door. "Really – why would I do that?" He asked.

Teyla raised an eyebrow. "It is a very comfortable couch," she said.

John shrugged. "Hmm… doesn't look that comfortable to me," he replied still smirking wickedly.

Teyla returned his smirk with one of her own. "You know, this is where it happens," she said.

"Where what happens?"

"This couch… four years from now," Teyla said.

John's eyes widened as he caught her meaning. "On a _couch_? How romantic," he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Teyla just raised her eyebrow again and John pushed off from the wall and walked over to where she was sitting. He loomed over her and Teyla smirked up at him.

John smiled. "You know, there's no way I'm not going to know it's you," he said.

Teyla frowned. "What?"

"In the future," John explained. "I'll know it's you. I mean not you."

Teyla smiled knowingly. "You will _not_ know," she said firmly.

John quirked an eyebrow. "Are you telling me that I am so dense I can't tell the difference between a you I've been married to for years, and a you who's just my friend?" He asked.

Teyla reached out and took his hand in hers. "I am afraid so, John," she said. She smiled teasingly. "But do not worry – I promise I will not be angry. I will still love you."

John shook his head. "I just don't believe that I could be that dense," he said.

Teyla just kept smiling. "We will see," she said.

John smirked at her. "Yes, we will," he said. He placed his hands on the couch behind her and leaned over her, his face inches from hers. "And by the way," he said, leaning in to kiss her, "I love you too."

_**Just over three years later.**_

Most of the giant plant had been disposed of by the time Teyla got back to Atlantis. Rodney was waiting for her in front of the gate but was really watching Katie, who was directing two marines pushing the last of it on a trolley.

"So, she – you – get home okay?" He asked as she got near.

Teyla smiled brightly and nodded. "Yes, thank you Rodney," she said, handing him the timer he had given her.

Rodney nodded. "Good good," he said. "So, that means that when you went back to your real time you knew about this giant plant fiasco?"

Teyla nodded again. "I also knew that Katie was pregnant," she said.

Rodney raised his eyebrows. "Well, thanks for not telling me," he said. Teyla knew he wasn't being sarcastic.

She patted him on the shoulder. "I had better go and find John," she said.

Rodney nodded. "Yeah, last I heard Casanova was by the botany lab," he said.

Teyla smiled again and hurried towards the botany labs. She was just about to step into a transporter when the doors opened and John stepped out.

His eyes widened when he saw her. "Teyla!"

Teyla smirked at him. "Casanova," she said teasingly.

John closed his eyes and shook his head in disbelief. "I really thought I'd know," he said.

Teyla smiled. "I told you that you wouldn't," she said.

John nodded. "Yeah, I know," he said. He looked at her for a moment and sighed. "I'm sorry. I just really missed you and you know I could never resist you when you're sitting in the sunlight and your hair –"

"Stop, stop!" Teyla said, laughing. "You do not have to explain yourself to me John. You did not do anything wrong."

"I should think not!" Said John, smirking. "After four years I'd like to think that I've got pretty-"

"John!" Teyla exclaimed, laughing again and swatting him on the arm.

She raised an eyebrow at him. "Congratulate yourself all you want, but the truth is _I _have been gone for three days and you have yet to welcome me back properly."

John raised an eyebrow right back at her. "You're right, how terrible of me," he said.

He grinned wolfishly and leant in to kiss her, one hand cupping the back of her head, his fingers raking through her hair, and the other on her hip, holding her close to him. Teyla's hands ran over John's chest as his lips slid gently over hers, and his tongue gently nipped against her lower lip, a promise of more to come later.

Teyla smiled as he pulled back and rested his forehead against hers. "I missed you too," she said. John kissed her briefly again and then stepped back, though his arm went round her shoulders, keeping her close.

"I was just on my way to Jen's," he told her.

Teyla looked at her watch. It was 15.56. "We had better hurry," she said. "She is due in the infirmary in four minutes."

John nodded and they walked through the corridors, discussing Teyla's recent visit with the Athosians, their arms wrapped tightly around each other.

They did not have far to go, and soon stopped in front of a set of doors. John knocked and the doors slid open a moment later, revealing Jennifer Kellar, a baby balanced on one hip.

"Teyla, you're back!" She said, smiling happily.

"Hello, Jennifer, we are sorry we are late," she replied with a smile of her own.

"Yeah, sorry," said John as they walked into her quarters. He smiled at the baby in her arms. "Hey Junior," he said, pulling faces at him. The baby smiled at him.

"Dada!" He said in a high-pitched voice.

Jennifer and Teyla laughed. "He's calling everything that at the moment," said Jennifer. "Don't worry."

John pretended to wipe his brow. "Thank god, I thought for a moment there was something I didn't know," he said. "Again…"

Teyla elbowed him in the ribs, though she was grinning.

"Momma!"

A knee-high blur ran at Teyla from the balcony and hugged her round the legs. Teyla grinned and bent down to pick up her three-year-old son. She hugged him close as he started talking a-mile-a-minute. Unlike little Ronon Junior, who could only say 'Dada', Tagan Sheppard had a word for _everything_. In several languages, thanks to the make-up of the Atlantis personnel.

The words did not always make much sense, but Teyla loved to listen to him.

"I draw a picture of a dog and dad said that he get me one and I draw picture of trex dad said I can't have one but Momma they funny and the dog will be lonely and needs a friend and Bel needs a pet too –"

Teyla raised an eyebrow at John. She highly doubted he had told their son that he could have a dog, and by the look on his face she knew she was right. She was glad he had said no to the T-Rex as well. Tagan had a fixation with dinosaurs.

John wandered over to the other side of the room to where a playpen had been set up. John bent over with a smile.

"Hey princess, come here," he said. He straightened up with their one-year-old daughter Isabella in his arms, and swung her through the air, making her laugh with delight. Teyla grinned. Isabella was such a Daddy's girl…

"Thanks for looking after them, Jennifer," said Teyla, smiling again at her friend. Jennifer nodded.

"It was my pleasure," she said. "I'd better get going though – I need to drop off this one with Laura, and then Ronon's picking him up in half an hour, after he's finished with the new recruits."

Teyla nodded. Childcare on Atlantis was often like a very complicated juggling routine.

Teyla kissed Isabella on the head as John came to stand next to her. "Alright, we'll catch up tomorrow," she said to the doctor. Jennifer nodded enthusiastically and she and John left her quarters.

Tagan squirmed in Teyla's arms and so she set him on the floor, his hand tight in hers as they walked towards their quarters.

"Sam is here, isn't she?" Said Teyla. "I will have to go and see her."

John looked at her sharply. "How did you know Sam was here?" He asked.

Teyla smirked at him. "You told me," she said. John laughed.

"Yeah, I guess I did," he said. "Is that how you knew that today was… you know? I mean you came running into our quarters like you knew what was going on – did Sam's being here tip you off?"

Teyla shook her head. "No, it was the giant plants," she said. "As soon as I saw them I knew that I was here, and I told Rodney. He went to research the next solar flare and I came to get… myself."

"Remind me to thank Rodney," John said.

Teyla smiled and looked down at Tagan, who was concentrating on not walking on any of the cracks in the floor, something he always did when walking anywhere.

"You know, from now on, we don't have a clue what's going to happen," said John. "It's a sobering thought."

Teyla raised an eyebrow at him, and waited for him to explain.

"Well, it's just that for four years we've known this day was going to happen, but from now on we don't know anything," he said.

Teyla smiled. "True," she said. "But I think we know more than enough."

John stopped walking and smiled at her, before leaning into kiss her. It was very short, just a brush of her lips, but enough to make Tagan exclaim "eeeewww!!" very loudly.

John and Teyla laughed at his reaction and started walking again. They definitely knew more than enough.

_The End._


End file.
